Some days I hate myself. There are things I have done, and things I have made others do, that I am not proud of. Most recently getting Jason involved in our Trevor Mason case. Possibly the worst mistake of my life. I know my sister was furious with me for what happened, and so were the kids. Especially Paul. He refused to speak to me for quite a while after everything Jason went through. Honestly? I can't blame him. I knew exactly how dangerous Mason was, and still asked a street kid to get information on him.
Our house has been shaken, figuratively as well as literally, since this whole thing started. It was bad enough when Jason disappeared, and everyone was mad at me. Now he's back, and every time he loses control or comes upstairs with dark circles under his eyes, and a pained wince, everyone glares at me. The only one who doesn't seem to be upset at me, is Jason. No, he hasn't been open about what he's been through--I still don't know everything Mason did to him, and probably never will,--and he has been pulling away from everyone, but he specifically told the others not to blame me. He told them he made his own choices, and doesn't blame anyone but Trevor Mason. Jason flinches a little every time the name is mentioned, and stuttered a bit when he said he only blamed Mason. Part of me believes he blames himself, more than he blames me.
After losing my parents I was able to get custody of Hannah, and took the responsibility to keep her safe and protected. When I met Jason, it was soon after our parent's death. So I was still new on the job, had recently taken in my sister to raise, and met a thirteen-year-old Jason. My protective instincts screamed at me to take him in, and get him somewhere safe. But he would not come. His trust in authority was thoroughly wrecked, and I didn't know for sure what happened until recently. Of course I had my suspicions, but Jason never confirmed anything until after we wrapped up the case.
Quite honestly, I believe Jason may be the strongest man I have ever met. He had the strength to not only escape a bad situation, but also to gather other street kids and protect them from the worst parts of living on the streets. Thanks to Jason, none of the kids fell into drugs or stealing. They also avoided other dangerous activities, like joining gangs or getting forced into prostitution, made more likely for kids by living on the street.
Jason's protection was invaluable, so it was not surprising that the kids were angry about what their protector went through. Trevor Mason had almost stolen their protector.
And I practically gift-wrapped Jason for him. I might never forgive myself for that.
End
The second of my 'character journals'- featuring the characters from the Earthshaker Series, and their thoughts after Tracker. If you like this sample, check out other examples of my writing on the blog, or follow the links on the page to get the books! Any comments? Feel free to share! Happy reading!
Adri
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Thursday, August 14, 2014
Character Journal Entry: Jason -1 (After Tracker, before Kindred)
Life has been a roller-coaster so far. Some days I can't believe I ever managed to escape. Others I don't believe I did. The days spent just hanging out with the kids are the best. There have been times I can imagine we're a normal group of friends, spending time together for fun, rather than necessity. But there's always the feeling of trepidation, like the good times can't possibly last. I don't know what to do to change. I can't forget what I've been through, but I can pretend some days that it was only a nightmare. Real fathers wouldn't treat their sons the way my father treated me. So I used to pretend he wasn't my father. He was a man who took me, and abused me, while my real father was still searching for me. My real father, who would someday swoop in and rescue me from the abusive drunk who raised me. But the delusion couldn't last. The monster was my father, and the woman who'd abandoned me was my mother.
On a more positive note, Sam is my brother. He has been surprisingly understanding after everything, and I'm glad he's been able to talk out his issues with Dustin and Hannah. I know part of my problem is being unwilling, or unable, to discuss what has happened, and that is why I'm writing this now. Talking about it with anyone else is not going to happen. And to be honest, I'm having a hard time writing about it, even if I'm the only one who will ever see this.
Well, here goes: Trevor Mason pushed me almost to my breaking point. I say 'almost' because, while I do have days that I wish he'd simply killed me, I also have days that get a little brighter when Sam tells a silly joke, or Hannah smiles...Hannah. She's another reason I'm not broken. When I feel like I'm falling apart, she hugs me, and pulls me back together. At least a little. But it's unfamiliar. Tense and awkward. At least on my part. Hugs, or any other gentle physical contact, are not something I've had much of, except if you count the kids.
The kids. Another reason to feel guilty. After...after everything I can't bring myself together enough to be there for them. I feel as though I've abandoned them. They seem to understand, but I've been their protector...their friend. How could I just let them go and move on?
Everyone keeps telling me to stop blaming myself. That Mason is the one who is at fault for everything that happened to me, and the consequences after. But my reactions are my own. I can't handle it. I can't process it. I almost knocked over Alice and Hannah's house because I can't control myself. Hannah keeps telling me to talk about it. What good can that do? What good can knowing how broken I really am do for anyone?
I don't know. But I guess I should at least consider trying, right? But not now. It's too raw. Physically and emotionally. So far, I can't even process everything that happened. What Mason did...what I did...my body is shaking just thinking about it, and I can't...
Later. Maybe some other time I can write about it, but not now. Now I need to take my meds and forget. Try to forget. It's for the best, anyway...Right?
end
I decided to try something new. Please don't hesitate to let me know what you think! This post sets the stage for Jason's mindset after the events of Tracker, and before Kindred. Happy reading!
Adri
On a more positive note, Sam is my brother. He has been surprisingly understanding after everything, and I'm glad he's been able to talk out his issues with Dustin and Hannah. I know part of my problem is being unwilling, or unable, to discuss what has happened, and that is why I'm writing this now. Talking about it with anyone else is not going to happen. And to be honest, I'm having a hard time writing about it, even if I'm the only one who will ever see this.
Well, here goes: Trevor Mason pushed me almost to my breaking point. I say 'almost' because, while I do have days that I wish he'd simply killed me, I also have days that get a little brighter when Sam tells a silly joke, or Hannah smiles...Hannah. She's another reason I'm not broken. When I feel like I'm falling apart, she hugs me, and pulls me back together. At least a little. But it's unfamiliar. Tense and awkward. At least on my part. Hugs, or any other gentle physical contact, are not something I've had much of, except if you count the kids.
The kids. Another reason to feel guilty. After...after everything I can't bring myself together enough to be there for them. I feel as though I've abandoned them. They seem to understand, but I've been their protector...their friend. How could I just let them go and move on?
Everyone keeps telling me to stop blaming myself. That Mason is the one who is at fault for everything that happened to me, and the consequences after. But my reactions are my own. I can't handle it. I can't process it. I almost knocked over Alice and Hannah's house because I can't control myself. Hannah keeps telling me to talk about it. What good can that do? What good can knowing how broken I really am do for anyone?
I don't know. But I guess I should at least consider trying, right? But not now. It's too raw. Physically and emotionally. So far, I can't even process everything that happened. What Mason did...what I did...my body is shaking just thinking about it, and I can't...
Later. Maybe some other time I can write about it, but not now. Now I need to take my meds and forget. Try to forget. It's for the best, anyway...Right?
end
I decided to try something new. Please don't hesitate to let me know what you think! This post sets the stage for Jason's mindset after the events of Tracker, and before Kindred. Happy reading!
Adri
Friday, July 4, 2014
New Price for Tracker on Kindle
Hi everyone! I have decided to lower the price on the Kindle version of Tracker to just $0.99! To get this awesome book at a great low price just click on the link at the side of the page!
Jason is unlike any other eighteen year old. Even barring that he lives on the streets to keep away from his possessive and abusive father, he is also able to detect slight vibrations in the earth allowing him to follow or avoid people with ease. In addition, he can manipulate the ground, calling it up to help protect against anyone who wishes to harm him or those he cares about, such as the group of other runaway children he protects. Over the years since the discovery of his power he has fine-tuned the ability to be able to recognize specific people based on the way they move.
His only contact with authority is Detective Alice Farrow, whom he helps with cases as a Confidential Informant. She is also one of the few people Jason has trusted with his hidden powers. While utilizing his abilities to pursue dangerous criminals, she does her best to keep him out of the line of fire.
Their latest case pits Jason against Trevor Mason, one of the city's most notorious criminals who is suspected of every crime from theft to violent torture and murder. Mason has discovered Jason's power and desires to use it for his own means. Jason must work with Alice and her partner to stop Mason before Jason becomes something he shouldn't: a tool of destruction for an evil man.
His only contact with authority is Detective Alice Farrow, whom he helps with cases as a Confidential Informant. She is also one of the few people Jason has trusted with his hidden powers. While utilizing his abilities to pursue dangerous criminals, she does her best to keep him out of the line of fire.
Their latest case pits Jason against Trevor Mason, one of the city's most notorious criminals who is suspected of every crime from theft to violent torture and murder. Mason has discovered Jason's power and desires to use it for his own means. Jason must work with Alice and her partner to stop Mason before Jason becomes something he shouldn't: a tool of destruction for an evil man.
Thursday, July 3, 2014
Habits/Streaks
I have always been the type to go in streaks with, well, pretty much everything I do. For example: If I like a specific actor, I watch a bunch of the movies/tv shows that actor has been in until I'm ready to move on to another actor I like. Or I like a specific kind of book or movie, so I hunt down any books or movies that fit the genre I am currently obsessed with.
The main activity that I have stuck with (now since about 5th or 6th grade) is horseback riding. It is one thing I believe I will always love, but even with riding I have streaks where I just don't feel like doing the work to get ready to ride.
My writing is no different. When I'm working on my books, I quite often write pretty regularly for several months, and then quit for a few weeks at a time. It's part of my 'take a break' philosophy for writing. (See article 'Writer's Block' on migzing.com) During that time I read like crazy, but can't force myself to do any writing. Every time I've tried to write while in this stage it has come out forced and stilted. Not flowing the way I like.
That I am currently working on a book with a co-author does not change my habits. The last few weeks I have done little to no work on any of the many writing projects I currently have in the works. Does that mean I've lost interest? Not at all. The only thing it means is that I am getting through the 'break time' and wanting to make sure the writing, when I do it, comes out naturally and allows my stories to flow naturally.
In the last week or so I have done a little bit of writing, and it is starting to flow a little more again. So my guess is that within the next couple days I will be in the streak of wanting to write like crazy, and will do little to no reading.
Do any of you have similar habits in your writing? I know the conventional way of thinking is that you should do a little bit of writing each day, but how realistic is that? Let me know what you think! I would love to know the habits of other authors. Happy writing everyone!
The main activity that I have stuck with (now since about 5th or 6th grade) is horseback riding. It is one thing I believe I will always love, but even with riding I have streaks where I just don't feel like doing the work to get ready to ride.
My writing is no different. When I'm working on my books, I quite often write pretty regularly for several months, and then quit for a few weeks at a time. It's part of my 'take a break' philosophy for writing. (See article 'Writer's Block' on migzing.com) During that time I read like crazy, but can't force myself to do any writing. Every time I've tried to write while in this stage it has come out forced and stilted. Not flowing the way I like.
That I am currently working on a book with a co-author does not change my habits. The last few weeks I have done little to no work on any of the many writing projects I currently have in the works. Does that mean I've lost interest? Not at all. The only thing it means is that I am getting through the 'break time' and wanting to make sure the writing, when I do it, comes out naturally and allows my stories to flow naturally.
In the last week or so I have done a little bit of writing, and it is starting to flow a little more again. So my guess is that within the next couple days I will be in the streak of wanting to write like crazy, and will do little to no reading.
Do any of you have similar habits in your writing? I know the conventional way of thinking is that you should do a little bit of writing each day, but how realistic is that? Let me know what you think! I would love to know the habits of other authors. Happy writing everyone!
Monday, June 2, 2014
Kindred- New Cover! :)
Friday, May 23, 2014
New Cover!
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Busy! (aka- Major Update :)
Hi everyone!
Wow, I have been busy lately. Between working full time, spending time with family, taking some time for my pets, and writing, I have not had much spare time for blogging. :) But here is another update for anyone interested:
I have been working on a co-authored book in the Dreampunk genre. This has so far been an interesting experience since my co-author and I have different approaches to writing and totally different styles. We have done a couple short stories now (one for an anthology with other authors and one to be submitted to a magazine or e-zine at some point) and are getting used to working together a little bit. So far it has definitely been a learning experience. I have been enjoying writing in a different genre, and writing in the third person again has been a trick (I often find myself switching between third person and first person, sometimes within the same paragraph! :) but I am enjoying it so far.
Earthshaker Series Book 3: Hunter is still in the editing phase. I have gone through for my own personal editing (first round, anyway) and will be giving copies to a couple of my readers this weekend to get their insight into the story line, and to fix grammatical and punctuation errors. I am still hoping to have this book ready for publication sometime either late summer or early fall of this year.
Tracker (Earthshaker Series Book 1) is in the process of getting a new cover! I have been working with a couple people on Facebook (Catt Dahman and David McGlumphy) on getting a cover that fits the story. Really looking forward to seeing the finished product and being able to get it switched out! Will post a picture when I have it available.
Earthshaker Series Book 4 is in the writing/planning stage. I have some of it written, and have been taking some time to figure out where I want the story to go, so once I have a little more time to write, the story will already be mostly in my head.
The fantasy novel I am planning to publish may end up being pushed back a little, until I get a bit further on the other projects, but Secret Power will be coming at some point! (And then I need to finish writing the sequel so I can get that out shortly after Secret Power) I'm not completely sure yet, but it may end up only being a two book series. Depends on how The Betrayal ends. :)
These are the main projects I am working on right now. Any comments/questions are welcome! And don't forget to check out Earthshaker Book 1: Tracker and Book 2: Kindred available on Amazon on Kindle or in Paperback!
Happy Reading! (or Writing, if you are an author!)
Wow, I have been busy lately. Between working full time, spending time with family, taking some time for my pets, and writing, I have not had much spare time for blogging. :) But here is another update for anyone interested:
I have been working on a co-authored book in the Dreampunk genre. This has so far been an interesting experience since my co-author and I have different approaches to writing and totally different styles. We have done a couple short stories now (one for an anthology with other authors and one to be submitted to a magazine or e-zine at some point) and are getting used to working together a little bit. So far it has definitely been a learning experience. I have been enjoying writing in a different genre, and writing in the third person again has been a trick (I often find myself switching between third person and first person, sometimes within the same paragraph! :) but I am enjoying it so far.
Earthshaker Series Book 3: Hunter is still in the editing phase. I have gone through for my own personal editing (first round, anyway) and will be giving copies to a couple of my readers this weekend to get their insight into the story line, and to fix grammatical and punctuation errors. I am still hoping to have this book ready for publication sometime either late summer or early fall of this year.
Tracker (Earthshaker Series Book 1) is in the process of getting a new cover! I have been working with a couple people on Facebook (Catt Dahman and David McGlumphy) on getting a cover that fits the story. Really looking forward to seeing the finished product and being able to get it switched out! Will post a picture when I have it available.
Earthshaker Series Book 4 is in the writing/planning stage. I have some of it written, and have been taking some time to figure out where I want the story to go, so once I have a little more time to write, the story will already be mostly in my head.
The fantasy novel I am planning to publish may end up being pushed back a little, until I get a bit further on the other projects, but Secret Power will be coming at some point! (And then I need to finish writing the sequel so I can get that out shortly after Secret Power) I'm not completely sure yet, but it may end up only being a two book series. Depends on how The Betrayal ends. :)
These are the main projects I am working on right now. Any comments/questions are welcome! And don't forget to check out Earthshaker Book 1: Tracker and Book 2: Kindred available on Amazon on Kindle or in Paperback!
Happy Reading! (or Writing, if you are an author!)
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